I recently started running again, and I was quickly reminded that it is a form of exercise I like in theory more than reality. It's a love/hate relationship because I truly do like it when I'm good at it, but right now, being a year out of practice, I stink. I'm trying to push through, and I've set a goal to work my way back up to a 5K hopefully by next month.
I think one of the reasons I'm struggling right now is the boredom factor. I run outside with no iPod or music entertainment of any sort, making it incredibly easy to focus on the shortness of breath and pain in my side rather than anything positive. But the other day something broke through the tedium. It wasn't a vision, but it was something I envisioned as clearly as if I was seeing a photograph in front of me. It was like all of the sudden I had this image of babies and children outside on a blanket, bunched together for a photo shoot. They didn't look at all alike, but every one of them was smiling. As the picture floated in my head, I felt God telling me, "These are the children of promise."
I remember years ago on the first anniversary of September 11th seeing a magazine with a front cover spread of the babies who had been born after that date. I remember thinking they were a dual symbol of grief and hope. They were reminders of so much that was lost, yet they were also beautiful pictures of life after the tragedy. "I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living." Psalm 27:13
This is the closest thing I can think of to compare what I saw. The picture had so many kids, and one of them was mine-the baby we haven't yet adopted, but who we know God has already chosen for us. The others were the children of my friends who walked this road with me. The kids didn't know it, but what they all shared in common was the fact that they all had a brother or sister in heaven who they would never know. They had no idea how special they were; they had no idea that they were the children of God's promise.
I doubt that photograph will ever be taken physically, but I feel the truth of the image is certain. I don't know when or how, but I believe that God will provide for each of us, in His perfect way, and in His flawless timing. That does not mean the road will be all sunshine from this moment on. God hasn't promised that. But He has promised in Psalm 30:5 that "Weeping may last for the night, but a shout of joy comes in the morning." I've already experienced this shout of joy in many ways, but I don't think it is complete. God has put on my heart the desire for another child, and I believe He wants to fulfill this in my life. I'm looking forward to seeing His promise play out, one beautiful child at a time.
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12 comments:
This was beautiful, Angie. Thank you.
Thank you! praying for you and all the children God has planned to bless you with:) jen in al
During my daily prayer time, that's what I'm praying for all of you families who've lost a child. I read the blogs to see the wonderful next chapter for each of you! I'm so excited to see what will happen next! God has a plan for each of you.
Lots of love,
Marlina in Vanc. WA.
What a beautiful picture that would be! They truly are Children of Promise! Thank you for this post today!
Angie, I can't tell you how much your vision means to me. I had a pretty down day but your words are such a blessing. I also vision our angels in Heaven sitting on a blanket together looking down at their brothers and sisters with laughter and joy as well. Won't that be so beautiful?
Love you,
Kim
I am in a group of women who have lost babies (but we meet monthly and socially rather than virtually), and we have that photograph. What a beautiful name for it - we felt the compulsion to take it, we have taken it, but now I have a name for it. We recently took a picture at someone'e home during a dinner for all our families. The picture had all of our living children in it - those we had before our losses and those babies born since our losses, and it is an incredible sight. In the three years we have been meeting, we have had eight babies, and we have another on the way. Our picture is truly of our children of promise. And given how close you women seem to have become, I would not be at all surprised if that picture of all of your future children didn't get taken at some point. You never know where you wil travel to in life.
I am in a group of women who have lost babies (but we meet monthly and socially rather than virtually), and we have that photograph. What a beautiful name for it - we felt the compulsion to take it, we have taken it, but now I have a name for it. We recently took a picture at someone'e home during a dinner for all our families. The picture had all of our living children in it - those we had before our losses and those babies born since our losses, and it is an incredible sight. In the three years we have been meeting, we have had eight babies, and we have another on the way. Our picture is truly of our children of promise. And given how close you women seem to have become, I would not be at all surprised if that picture of all of your future children didn't get taken at some point. You never know where you wil travel to in life.
thanks for sharing, angie! very encouraging!
How beautiful a picture you portray. Thank you for that. And good luck with your running goal. I just finished my first mini marathon (13.1) yesterday in Louisville. It was hard but very rewarding.
Angie-
What a beautiful picture in my mind... of those precious children with the Lord, but also our children, both present and future, here with us. Amazing. Thank you for sharing such a beautiful image and continuing to be such wonderful support! You are awesome!
Love you and praying for that baby!
Kenz
I believe, I believe, I believe, I believe. :)
Mark 10:13-16
13 And they were bringing children to him that he might touch them, and the disciples rebuked them. 14But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, "Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. 15 Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it." 16 And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands on them.
I love this verse for the hope of our children. The same reference in Luke uses the greek word for infants.
Jesus scoups them up in his arms and blesses them. The word for blessing in the Scriptures, both OT and NT, carries a magnitude more meaning than the word we use for blessing in our culture when we use it after a person sneezes. It is redemptive and eternal in significance.
I enjoyed your post. Hope you are doing well. We are praying for you.
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